Been A Long Long Time….

Wow, it’s been almost 3 years since I updated this site! That’s a bit nuts, a freshman would be a junior by the time I updated this. Sorry guys! Probably means that I’ve moved on to some other pursuits so I will pronounce that I have officially suspended the CBB blog until further notice. Thanks for the reads and who knows, I may be back sometime!

24 Event this Friday & Saturday!

Come one come all to the PA Statewide 24!

I am currently securing a 2nd mortgage to finance a Cheesesteak Challenge for 2 very special intercessory families – that’s 9 cheesesteaks. Hopefully we have a bunch of pictures and stuff of this joyful occasion.

Off to The Call Tomorrow

Heading down on a $15 bus ticket to The Call tomorrow. I am gonna do what I can to own up to our collective failure as a country to stay faithful to the principles of the founding fathers, based upon the Bible, Judeo-Christian values, and tolerance of people to follow their own conscience. We have deviated from that, and many of us who do try to follow the Bible are just assuming that God is supposed to fix the situation. God is sovereign but his nature often requires people to go out of their way to intercede for the majority. So that’s what a bunch of people are doing tomorrow. We’re bringing our water so we don’t dehydrate, but we’re gonna fast and pray.

Just watched an hour of C-SPAN footage of The Call’s press conference featuring Lou and Mike Huckabee among others. Refreshing.

Never Gonna…

This is a remarkable piece of work. Thanks Hugh for creating this!

…and could anyone confirm that the Senator had an under-publicized stint as a bartender in the mid-80s? Check out around 1:15 and you’ll see what I mean. Thanks for the tweet, Randy.

Todd’s Back

CBB is happy to report that Todd Bentley is back at the revival this Friday. I am probably going to ease off on the levity in favor of soliciting prayer for Todd & the overall event. Some of you who might not appreciate Todd’s ministry are flocking to this post, which captures the eerie similarity to a WWF wrestler. I thought it was cute too, that’s why I posted it. However pray for Todd and his team – I want this guy to reach every purpose that God has for him in this season, and not to get burned or tired out.

Pray for Psalty – He’s Homeless!

Here’s one reason why I try to feed the homeless – because I might actually be ministering to Psalty unawares. Thanks to VH1’s Behind the Music for this insightful exposé.

Is This Tie Abominable?

"Reti(e)ring" the tie

"Reti(e)ring" the tie

Apparently it must be. I was walking into my girlfriend’s center city apartment and the security guard hassles me about the tie. Actually he was more subtle than that. “Nice tie” he said as my gf was walking out to greet me. She instantly zeroed into this tie.

Now I have had more success with floral type ties in the past, particularly with the female gender. Apparently it is the color and the texture of this tie that is just unacceptable. However she did concede that the green of the tie does match the shirt.

So this tie is apparently on its way to the Sal-Val. I think one of my brothers pawned it off on me.

I just wanted to get this off my chest… ugh, didn’t see that coming.

Psalm 23 – the “Prosperity” Psalm?

Ok, I seldom pass anything on, but the following is worthy of a blog-scrape. For the record, I was raised Baptist and sent to a hard-core religious school that really stressed the importance of the Bible. However, it’s pretty easy to use one’s understanding of scripture as a baseball bat rather than a tool to experience God’s love & “pass it on” (yes, the quotes refer to that 70s song).

The point of this parody is to highlight how ridiculous it is to always assume the worst. Reading way too much stuff between the lines becomes a lose/lose situation pretty fast. Even with Psalm 23!

This was written by a pastor in South Dakota and it is pretty funny. [Note: apparently he picked it from somewhere else as well] A bit of counter-sarcasm to some revival critics out there. Here in Philly most people are still warning their congregations to stay away from Toronto. I don’t have the heart to mention that was 15 years ago now. Or the new Lakeland stuff! Well enjoy… I hope.

"Now let's not get too silly..."

"Now let's not get too silly..."

****************************************

HERESY HUNTERS INSTITUTE, INC.
Address unlisted

Dear brother,

Thank you for sending us the questionable document. We are always glad to examine any teaching materials that may adversely affect the Church. We do think that this material is dangerous and certainly want to warn the Body of Christ concerning its subtle false doctrines. Our analysis is as follows:

The document:

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.
Yes, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

We weren’t given the name of the author of this document, but it is quite clear that is part of the contemporary, humanistic “gospel” of self.

The first thing we would point out is that this is a “positive confession.” Our research shows that this idea was never heard of in the Church before the metaphysical cults introduced it in the late 19th century. This author has obviously been influenced by these cults.

Secondly, note the “affirmation” that he will not want. This is clearly that “gospel of greed” – the prosperity gospel. Whoever wrote this probably is a follower of these dreadful prosperity preachers. Sorry you couldn’t come up with the author so we could do a background check on him or her. Even without the author’s name, it’s still pretty clear who influenced this individual.

Then the author affirms himself to be perfectly led by the Lord. This is the dangerous delusion of elitism. Many of these groups feel they are the only true Christians. They are the only ones who really represent the name of the Lord. You can see the tremendous spiritual pride lurking behind this, I’m sure.

Our author tells us that he walks through the shadow of death. Obvious Christian Science influence here. Denying the reality of matter and evil. This is indeed a pernicious error. This is also practiced by denying the reality of sickness. Sickness, evil and death are mere illusions. Very dangerous!

Notice the references to “green pastures” and “still waters.” The cults always resort to metaphoric symbols and encourage their victims to visualize. This, of course, opens their minds up to demonic influence. Note also that a life of ease and blessing is pictured, very appealing to the flesh. Seldom do these people ever talk about taking up our cross and following Jesus.

The author now mentions restoring the soul. We see two possible references to dangerous teachings here. Firstly, the teaching of restoration. This is false teaching that suggests that the Church isn’t all God wants it to be. Of course, that is unacceptable. We have the Bible; we need nothing beyond the Scriptures. And then secondly, there could be a suggestion of the teaching of inner healing. We have a paper on this error available if you should so desire.

I will fear no evil; for you are with me. Notice the big “I.” Bold, arrogant, egotistical statements like this are common among these groups. Totally devoid of humility. I think you can see the obvious, humanistic bent.

Your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Clearly the error of the authority of the believer is being implied here. Taking the place of God and assuming that mere sinful men can actually wield the rod of God. To say this is presumptuous is mild. This is the “little gods” error. These false teachers never have a due regard for the sovereignty of God.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. The archangel Michael did not dare to bring an accusation against Satan, but these types of teachers boldly mock the Devil. This suggests an unhealthy preoccupation with “spiritual warfare.”

You anoint my head with oil. The height of arrogance. So many today claim they are the anointed of the Lord and no one should question their teachings and activities. I’m sure this author, whoever he is, considers himself to be one of God’s “special” anointed ones.

My cup runs over.
Another allusion to prosperity. A “positive confession” of abundance. Decidedly derived from Unity or one of the other metaphysical cults.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. No suffering, no trials, no difficulties in life! This is not the Bible gospel. These teachers hold out the promise of problem-free living and then bilk those who listen to them of their finances to support their extravagant life-styles. What a mockery of the cross.

I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever. Actually this type of teaching doesn’t belong in the Church at all. This gospel of greed, positive confession and trouble-free living certainly isn’t based on the Bible.

Thank you for sending us this example of heretical teaching. We advise you to steer clear of this teacher. Although it may have a veneer of Biblical sounding ideas, it is clearly imported from metaphysical and New Age teachings.

Sincerely,
Anonymous

Philadelphia Dead-Raising & Nuptuals: Ben & Betsy

Ralph Archbold takes a fine woman home
Ralph Archbold takes a fine woman home

Well half of this is true at least – Ben Franklin and Betsy Ross have gotten hitched. I saw it yesterday before the Philly Pops concert. My girlfriend spotted the opportunity and we showed up for it. The pops played some great tunes – “Indiana Jones” theme (hers) and of course “Rocky” (mine). Mayor Nutter officiated on a platform in front of Independence Hall.

Actually Ben & Betsy are pretty decomposed by now, 300 years after they roamed these streets. This couple is the closest resemblance we have to them. I heard they met on match.com.

Fun with Firefox 3

I bet he answers to \

You gotta love those guys at Mozilla, makers of the Firefox web browser. If you didn’t realize from the post title, it is now in its third incarnation. And it’s a good one!

Firefox 3

If you don’t have it yet you can get it here.

And once you have it, you can type the following code into the address bar for some nerd humor:

about:robots

Enjoy.